Today is a quick bonus episode. I want to bring up something that’s been on my mind and something that I wasn’t actually sure if I was going to share. I had to marinate on it for a little bit, but in the end, I do think it’s important to speak up about this.
I want to talk about all the labeling happening, the shaming, and the cancel culture taking place. The world has become a digital equivalent of an angry mob with torches and pitchforks running people out of town, or in this case, the internet.
So take a listen. If you do resonate with this episode and you want to chat with me about this further, you can reach out to me on Instagram @kendraperryinc. I am happy to chat with you, whether you agree with me or not. I will have compassionate discourse and communication and conversation with you. Even if you don’t agree with me, I would love to hear your point of view.
We will be back for regular programming on Monday with the next episode of the Wealthy Coach Podcast.
Listen to the podcast here:
(BONUS) The Digital Mob With Torches & PitchforkS
This is a quick and a little bit of a bonus episode but I did want to bring up something that has been on my mind and something that I wasn’t sure if I was going to share. I had to marinate on it for a little bit, but in the end, I do think it’s important to speak up about this. That is the purpose of this episode. Clearly, there’s a lot going on in the world, especially in the United States. As you guys know, I’m Canadian, but in Canada, we are very much inundated with media from the US, so we’re always pretty aware. It doesn’t take that much to be aware with what’s going on with our Southern friends. Since all the events have happened, I’ve been seeing some concerning things online.
In particular, I saw this one post. It upset me. It highly triggered me and I didn’t quite know what to do with it. I’ve considered, should I read this post on the show or should I not? I decided that I’m not going to because I don’t want to single this person out. Mostly because this person isn’t the only one of whom I’ve seen this type of behavior for it but I’ll give you the breakdown of generally what it was. I’m sure you’ve seen things like this out there. There are some people on social media who are going after business owners and influencers who are promoting things that they deem to be untrue. They’re saying, “There’s a big group of us, we’re going to make a list, we’re going to go after you, the business owner and the brands who support you and try to get them to drop them.”
They’re making this list and going after people who are speaking out about things that they have deemed to be untrue. I lost sleep over this because what I was picturing in my brain and what I was having nightmares about after this was this is the digital equivalent of an angry mob with torches and pitchforks running people out of town. This is what it is but just in an online application. I felt very shocked, concerned, and incredibly sad because that speaks to the type of hate certain people are feeling towards other people online.
This is the hate that people are feeling towards other people of whom they have never met. I’m seeing so much of this behavior and it’s significant. It’s crazy to me because we do not live in the age of information. In my opinion, we live in the age of disinformation. There is so much information there, it is incredibly difficult to figure out what is up and what is down. I’m someone who does a lot of my own personal research and I have a lot of trouble figuring out what’s true and what’s not. Sometimes, I spend a lot of time going down rabbit holes to try to figure out if something is true or not and I still don’t know.
I believe that anyone who claims to know what is true in the world right now is full of shit because in the end, there isn’t one singular truth. There are multiple truths by multiple people who are all viewing the world through different viewpoints, experiences, and cultures. Going after people who don’t think like you do is very self-righteous and it speaks to a lot of ego. I’m not trying to shame. We all have ego. Sometimes, when I speak with people who don’t agree with what I’m saying or have different perspectives, it hurts my ego too.
The difference is I do believe people need to be careful with how reactive they are being because when you’re acting in that matter, you’re reacting and you’re not seeing these people as human. You’re seeing them as whatever label that you’re giving you. I always wonder this digital mob that’s running around the internet trying to maybe de-platform people, put them out of business and take away their brand sponsorships. Is this something that they are going to look back on their lives and be proud of?
Are they going to be proud that they spent their precious and very limited time on this planet trying to take down other people’s businesses and take away the means of which they support their family? I’d like to think that they wouldn’t. It’s not something that I would be proud of. In nowaday’s day and age, especially with the online world where we don’t see people in community, in-person, especially in the COVID times where people are disconnected from humans, in general, it’s easy to dehumanize people and give them labels. Leftist, racist, Trump supporter, anti-vaxxer, conspiracy theorist, COVID denier, and climate change denier to name a few.
When we label people, we take away their humanity and we dehumanize them. The only reason some of the most awful things that have happened in our history happen is because of dehumanization. When we see people as humans, we see that they are humans. When we hear their stories, we see their experience. When we see them, touch them, and we are in their energy, we empathize with them. We can imagine walking a mile in their shoes. We see ourselves in their stories and see what we have in common. When they are human to us, we respect them as fellow human beings.
It is dehumanization that has allowed horrible tragedies and genocides to occur on this planet like the Nazi revolution in the ’40s. The Jewish people were less than human. The residential schools in human or in Canada. We saw indigenous people as savages who didn’t deserve to keep their culture. We threw their children in these residential schools to reschool them and strip them of their culture and of their ancestry. In the slave trade, slaves were seen as not human or less than human. There are so many examples of this on the planet in our own countries and all over the world.
These people were taught not to be human or to be less than human. That is why these terrible things have happened because they became unhuman. I am not a fan of any of these labels and I don’t personally enjoy being labeled. I do my best not to label other people because people are more than labels. They are humans. They are mothers, fathers, children, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, and friends. We are not that different. We maybe have different spirituality, belief systems, or maybe different political views. We might live in different places geographically and interests but we’re not that different. We are all human. I truly believe that most of us can find a way in which to connect.
I understand that people are angry. They’re angry at things they’re seeing in the media, TV, and at so many things going on in the world because 2020 was truly the reveal. It revealed so much to us of things that aren’t working. The systems of which that run our world aren’t working. There are no safety nets for so many people on this planet. When something like COVID happens, there’s nowhere for people to go. Now, we have poverty, unemployment, depression, suicide, drug overdose, and all these horrible things. People are upset and I get it. Shame is not the answer.
Shaming Doesn’t Work
Shaming someone because of the way they think, believe, or the way they perceive the world does not work. Ask Brene Brown. Brene Brown has been studying shame and vulnerability for decades. She says shame doesn’t work and I believe her. We cannot shame people into changing their viewpoints, abandoning their beliefs, change on this planet, and planet into change. Shame is the lowest vibration. When you shame people, you exclude them, single them out, treat them as less than human, and there’s a good chance that they are going to double or triple down on their belief system. Them against us, us against them.
You may not agree with me but I truly believe that the only way for us to change this planet is to see each other as human and not to dehumanize, label, and digitally go after people with the virtual torch, run them out of town, and put them out of business. The only way for us to change is through empathy, compassion, and love. These are the only vibrations that I truly believe lead to change. We need to stop being at war with each other, hating each other, being self-righteous, thinking we’re better than each other, or we know more than each other.
We need to try and understand each other. We need to listen and communicate with each other even if the other person does not have the same viewpoint as us. Why is it so scary that someone doesn’t think, believe, and feel exactly like we do? Why is that scary? It’s because it gets our ego and it’s an opportunity for us to change. When we feel that reactive feeling in our chest, when someone says something that we don’t agree with or is outside our belief system, and all we want to do is react, let that be your teacher and ask why.
Why can’t we have empathetic and compassionate discourse with each other because we are not going to shame this planet into change? I don’t want to live in a world, frankly, where people are afraid to say what’s on their mind, express themselves, and speak their truth in fear of hate, death threats, and being put out of business. What kind of world would that be if we all thought the same thing? I don’t want to live in a world where people are shamed, harassed, and trolled because they see the world differently.
No One Truth
As I mentioned in the beginning, there is no one truth or universal truth. There are many multiple perspectives, viewpoints, and truth observed from the collective based on everyone’s unique experience. We are all different. We come from different places. We see the world differently. We live in this disinflation world where truth is elusive. Many people are lying and there’s so much information. We don’t even know what’s up or down anywhere more.
Poor, Drunk Girl
It hurts me to think that people are out there having their livelihoods affected by people who have deemed themselves to be the holders of truth when there is none to begin with. Let me give you an example. I’ve used this example in another show so you might recognize this. Let’s say, we go to a party and there’s a drunk girl. The drunk girl is wasted and she’s fallen all over the place. There are four people standing around the drunk girl watching her behavior. Are they all going to perceive the same thing about drunk girl’s behavior? No. Some people are going to be like, “That used to be me. I used to be drunk girl. Poor drunk girl.” Another person might be like, “Drunk girl should be ashamed of herself. That is disgusting behavior. I am not going to talk to her.” The other person, it might not even faze them. They might not even notice it so much that they decide to ignore the whole situation.
The fourth person might be concerned about the drunk girl and try to help her. You are not going to hear four of the same stories about a drunk girl after the party. The next morning, you’re going to hear four different stories from four different perspectives. It is so important. Quickly before I hop off now because I’m on my soapbox here, I wanted to speak about cancel culture. You probably know what this is. It’s finding people who they did something in their past or they did something in present time and then people cancel them.
We try to take them down, take them out, and we cancel them. I’ve heard people use the term now anti-cancel culture. It’s people who don’t want to cancel people because of something they did. Cancel culture is a fucking cop-out, in my opinion. It totally removes you from having a conversation with someone and engaging in discourse with someone who has a different viewpoint than them. Instead of doing the hard thing, which is to squash our egos and empathetically and compassionately listen to someone who may not think or believe the same thing as you, you cancel them and walk away.
You are ignoring the teacher and the learning experience that is in front of you. I have done some shitty things in my life. I was a very different person in my 20s. I drank a lot, did a lot of drugs, I was a crazy partier, and hooked up with so many people. I was a mess, I hated myself, and I was not doing it in an empowered way. I lied, I stole, and I did all kinds of things. I’ve spoken about some of those things. Wouldn’t it be sad if I was judged for those things that I have done in the past, canceled, and I didn’t have the opportunity to be a better person? I believe people can change. Nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes.
Obviously, some people have more public lives because they’re influencers, business owners, entrepreneurs, celebrities, or whatever are making their mistakes in the public eye. I want to tell you another story. There’s this man. I believe he fought overseas in the army. He came back, he was mad, he fell into white supremacy, and he became a part of the Ku Klux Klan. He was mad and he hated all people of color. Someone saw something in him. Someone helped him see the error in his ways and he changed. Now, what he does is he helps Ku Klux Klan members change, leave behind their racist beliefs, and become people who love and care for people regardless of their skin type or skin color.
We could have canceled him and he would never have had the opportunity to change. The way that he is transforming these people, it’s through empathy, common experience, love, and compassion. He’s not shaming them because that doesn’t work. Imagine if we had canceled this man. There would have been potentially dozens or even hundreds of these KKK members who never changed. We have to think about this when we think about canceling people. I am an anti-cancel culture person if I’m going to put a label on myself. I don’t believe in cancel culture and I don’t claim to know what’s true and what’s not. That doesn’t mean I agree with everything I see out there. I can tell you, I have opinions and I don’t agree with a lot of things but I also have no problem loving and caring for people who have different opinions.
That is what I have for you for this episode. I hope you resonate with this. If you do resonate with this and you want to chat with me about this further, you can reach out to me on Instagram. My handle is @KendraPerryInc. I am happy to chat with you whether you agree with me or not. I will have compassionate discourse, communication, and conversation with you even if I don’t agree with you. I would love to hear your point of view.
Thanks for letting me get that off my chest. You are my therapy. I appreciate you. We will be back for regular programming with the next episode of the Wealthy Coach Podcast where I help you go from broke AF to wealthy AF. Thank you so much for reading. I’m wondering, do you want to help me with my mission to end health coach poverty? If you do, I need all the help I can get. All I need is two minutes of your time. If you could leave me a five-star review on iTunes, that would help so much. These reviews help get my show in front of more people which means that I can reach more health coaches and complete my mission. Thank you so much for your help. I can’t wait to talk to you in the next episode.